5 Ways Advertisers Want Me To Celebrate July 4th

This was something that started appearing about July 1st, and got to be seriously out of hand. At least to me anyhow. It’s almost like holidays are just all commercial now.

Ok, let me back up. All during the past week we’ve been hit over the head with things to do for Independence Day. So here’s a list of the top five.

Things people want me to do to celebrate our Independence Day:

1. Buy a Toyota

2. Visit Lowe’s or Home Depot and buy something

3. See a Realtor about buying a house

4. Buy furniture from Raymoor & Flanagan because there’s no interest till 2013

5. Oh, eat at Outback Steakhouse

What???

Yeah this is how we should be spending our week remembering how this country was born – by shopping for stupid shit!

Wait, let’s all go eat tomatos and puke on the advertisers in red white and blue.

And people wonder why we’re all in such a financial mess as a nation. Duhhhh.

(and Bill now steps down from his soapbox to blow his hand up with a firecracker)

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